If you have adopted the NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) Principles, now I will tell you about the main topics that constitute the 4 pillars of NLP.
Just as there are players in certain positions that form the skeleton of a football team, we can say that these 4 main topics are the skeleton of NLP.
When you read these topics, you will understand better what awareness NLP wants to bring to you with its techniques and how it wants to bring you to your best version. If you’re ready, let’s start!
The Skeleton (4 Pillars) of NLP:
1- Communication and Harmony:
The first issue that forms the skeleton of NLP is the harmonious and high quality relationship and harmony with oneself and others.
If we start with our inner harmony, when we are in harmonious communication with ourselves in situations defined as our physical, mental and spiritual inner harmony, we achieve the physical health we can achieve physically, the happiness and peace we can achieve mentally, and the feeling of serving or belonging to a greater purpose or whole we can achieve spiritually.
You may have seen or experienced these situations yourself: people who say they want to lose weight but can’t lose weight, people who say they can’t do anything and are very unhappy, people who say they want so much things but can’t take action and are discouraged, or people who are stuck between two decisions.
Even when you imagine the communication style in these examples, it depresses you, doesn’t it?
When people are in this situation, they disturb not only themselves but also those around them or lower their energy. When it comes to communicating with others, if you look carefully, you will see that the body language, voice tones and even word patterns of people who communicate well with each other continue in the same harmony.
NLP considers the correct and harmonious communication with yourself and other people, in other words, achieving true harmony, to be the most important factor in achieving goals and self-realization.
2- Know What You Want:
The second topic is the well-known argument “Know What You Want!”, which is often used in the world of personal development.
Without knowing what you really want, you will not know if you have achieved your goal and you will never feel like you’re accomplished and enough.
So if you are stuck between two decisions, ask yourself “what do I want?” and if you are not fully satisfied with what you want, ask “why do I want what I want?” and you will find the real answer. Be clear in your answers.
Or if you are helping someone else with this, don’t ask “what’s the problem?”, just ask them “what they really want to do?” when they say they don’t know what their problem is and how to decide.
In this way, you or the person you help will communicate more harmoniously with yourself and you will be at the point of knowing what you want and taking action.
NLP explains you that in order to know that you have truly succeeded and are in harmony with yourself, you need to know what you really want.
3- Sensory Acuity:
The third topic is about using our senses, seeing, hearing and feeling the states of ourselves and others in the actions we take or in the communications we have towards our goals.
We can better understand whether we are on the right track while we are working towards our goals, when we are aware of the state of our feelings or inner voice when we are doing that work, and for that we need sensory acuity.
When communicating with people, we need sensory acuity to change these reactions and communicate better by being aware of our body’s reactions such as playing with our hair, turning red in our face or dilating our pupils when we feel embarrassed or angry.
Or we need sensory acuity in order to understand what the other person is feeling by paying attention to their reactions and to communicate more harmoniously.
NLP says that we need sensory acuity to know whether we are on the path to our goals and to communicate harmoniously with ourselves and others.
4- Behavioral Flexibility:
The last issue that forms the skeleton is flexibility of behavior.
In our Principles of NLP article I wrote that one of the principles is that “the more options we have, the more flexible we are”. This is about changing our options and what we do until we achieve our goal.
This often sounds easy, but many of us insist on doing the same things and expecting different results instead of trying different things.
This applies not only to the actions we take in achieving our goals, but also in communicating with other people.
You all know Albert Einstein‘s famous quote:
It is madness to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.
NLP tells us that in order to increase our chances of achieving our goals, we need to understand whether we are on the right track to achieve our goal with our sensory acuity or the results we obtain in the actions we take, and increase our options by trying different things by making small or big changes in our actions.
I will also go into the details of these topics that make up the skeleton of NLP one by one and explain what you can do and what you should pay attention to.
When we examine these topics in detail and apply them together, you will see and feel the differences in yourself very quickly.
Again, now, before you finish reading this article, I want you to filter all these issues through your own mind map, internalize them with your whole self and feel the awareness that arises within you.
Be full of energy! Believe in yourself! Live with passion!
Take care of yourself!
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